That’s what we’re relegated to – brown M&Ms – a steady diet of nothing but brown M&Ms. Expect nothing more for the foreseeable future.
When I saw the official poster of Dolt 45, that’s what I thought about – brown M&Ms.
A bit of explanation is in order. In the heyday of Van Halen, they had a rider in their contract forbidding brown M&Ms. For you whippersnappers, Van Halen was a very popular pop/rock band in the 1970s.
While the rider looked like an eccentric indulgence of entitled first-worlders, it was really a stalking horse provision. Since Van Halen used massive, ear-piercing amps, there was always the fear older venues could not accommodate the weight of the massive equipment. If there was a failure, it would endanger everyone – band, crew, fans alike.
The rider was placed in the contract as a signal. If the crew found brown M&Ms backstage, they knew someone didn’t read the contract and more importantly, didn’t read the technical requirements of the riders. Brown M&Ms meant: Danger Will Robinson – check out the equipment, electricity, performance rigging. In short, watch for haphazard, half-assed preparation leading to dangerous sub par performance.
So far, these first three weeks of Dolt 45’s administration has been nothing but brown M&Ms. (Forgive me for linking to an Andrew Sullivan essay, but it does have a couple of brilliant observations.)
Just spit ballin’ here, but if you were going to say, “throw a huuuuuuge inauguration,” wouldn’t you take the time to proofread the official poster? To do otherwise, would be “unpresidented”!
It’s just like the list of fabricated “terrorist attacks” where attack was spelled “attak,” attacker was spelled “attaker,” San Bernardino lost an “r” during an “attak” of the letterists, and there’s a new country called “Denmakr” that our map-lover-in-chief will never be able to find.
If you can’t do the little things like let spell check win, you can bet the big things like Yemeni raids aren’t getting the attention they demand. What can you expect though since it seems the White House is just a weigh station between golf outings at Mar-a-lago? This latest weekend jaunt was just product placement for selling memberships to well-to-do Japanese.
By this time in my life I should realize that intellectual consistency is too great a burden to expect from politicians. Who can expect them to remember the issues to which they swear fealty as they bark and bray?
For instance, remember all those times McTurtle and any number of other no-chinned, pillowish, chalk drones warbled, “Consistency! We must have consistency! Business growth demands consistency! Obamacare and job programs and immigration reform do not lead to consistency! We must have consistency!”
Heard any of those voices recently? Not a one dares cross Lord Commander Marmalade. They live in fear of his tweets. Like an electronic Typhoid Mary, they quiver and quake at Twittering Donald.
And remember Obama’s apologizing to the world causing the U.S. to be seen as weak? Now we just apologize as we turn the lights out on U.S. leadership worldwide. The most alarming thing I have read is that Darth Bannon sees inevitable existential conflicts in both the Middle East and Asia. Dolt 45’s ineptitude is driving stalwart allies like Australia toward China.
While the disappointment of the stolen election is still painful to us as we settle in to the Putin/Bannon/Drumpf administration, we can take solace in the fact a woman is leading the free world. If only it was Hillary. It looks as if Chancellor Angela Merkel is the hope of global progressive democracy.
Until we grow tired of our lying national security incompetents, our war hungry puppeteers, and our Russian overlord, we will just have to stomach those brown M&Ms.
Take the conversation in any direction you might like. I sincerely hope everyone is feeling better and Contrask, your surgery will be topmost in our thoughts and prayers. We look forward to when you can again — Jump!
After the week we’ve had, we have earned a few minutes of unadulterated chillaxing. Fredster is under the weather and feeling quite unwell. Beam him some telepathic healing energy.
Since this is Grammys weekend, I thought we would start with the five songs competing for Record of the Year. Of course, “Hello” I have my favorite.
Post anything you want – it’s our time to chillax. Enjoy.
Hello — Adele
Formation — Beyoncé
7 Years — Lukas Graham
Work — Rihanna Featuring Drake
Stressed Out — Twenty One Pilots
And here’s a nominee for best dance recording Don’t Let Me Down from The Chainsmokers featuring Daya.
And a nominee for best pop duo, Sia featuring Sean Paul for Cheap Thrills.
And one last thought, please, please, please, let this happen tonight on SNL.
Paging the White House Physician!
I’m sure tRump has completely blown a gasket. Of course the tweets will probably wait until late at night or early in the a.m.
To quote our Prolix:
With due deliberation and a judicious nature, the 9th Circuit whacked Donnie’s little peepee. Hard.
So here’s a new post.
Are we there yet? It has been a dizzying 64 years of the Trump presidency. Eh? What’s that you say? It’s only been 3 weeks? Are you sure? I feel like I’ve aged 64 years. There’s certainly been enough nonsense to fill 64 years (give or take a dozen) Presidencies. Drumpf keeps issuing executive orders. Though we are still primarily only talking about the Radical Moose. Lamb. one. And rightfully so. As the case snakes its way through the court system, likely to end up before the Supreme Court, Democrats are gearing up for a fight over Trump’s SCOTUS pick. Chuck Schumer met with the judge and former model Gorsuch and came out of the meeting unimpressed.
Schumer said he pressed Gorsuch, whom President Donald Trump nominated last week, about hot button legal and constitutional issues that are related to the new President. For instance, Schumer asked about a Muslim ban, the Emoluments Clause, voter fraud allegations and whether Gorsuch agreed with conservative lawyers who have said some of the President’s executive orders have gone too far.
“But the judge today avoided answers like the plague. This President is testing fundamental underpinnings of our democracy and its institutions. These times deserve answers and Judge Gorsuch did not provide them. I have serious, serious concerns about this nominee,” Schumer told reporters after the nearly hour-long meeting in his Capitol office.
(Ok, I was only stating an alternative fact about Gorsuch being a former model. He was only a foot model and those aren’t important.) One hopes Democrats do everything they can to stop Gorsuch’s appointment to the Court. It looks like they are gearing up for this fight. They lost the Betsy DeVos battle, but it’s important to note they did get 2 Republicans to vote against one of the stupidest and least qualified people to ever have a cabinet position (and that is a very high bar!!!)
Speaking of unqualified, poor Sean Spicer, the gum chewing zombie/vampire Trump hired as his press secretary against his own wishes, might soon be looking for work. It was Priebus who convinced Trump to hire Spicer, vouching for him. Unfortunately for the hapless, unhinged and barely qualified Spicer he has to work for Trump, which means going out every day and explaining the unexplainable and lying to the press. Trump watches his press conferences and then summons him to get yelled at for being a failure. No wonder poor Spicer looks like a zombie. And after the lacerating SNL skit in which Spicer was portrayed by Melissa McCarthy, it seems as if Spicer’s career in the White House might soon be coming to an end. Politico reported that Trump was livid, not by the portrayal of Spicer as a raving, lying lunatic, but by the fact that Spicer was portrayed by a female.
More than being lampooned as a press secretary who makes up facts, it was Spicer’s portrayal by a woman that was most problematic in the president’s eyes, according to sources close to him. And the unflattering send-up by a female comedian was not considered helpful for Spicer’s longevity in the grueling, high-profile job in which he has struggled to strike the right balance between representing an administration that considers the media the “opposition party,” and developing a functional relationship with the press.
“Trump doesn’t like his people to look weak,” added a top Trump donor.
Publicly, Spicer himself tried to downplay the skit, saying only that McCarthy might want to tone it down a bit. But the remarkable thing about McCarthy’s performance is that… well, it really wasn’t all that exaggerated. Spicer’s screaming rambling ravings from the podium were delivered by McCarthy as they are. That’s what makes the skit not only
incredible comedy, but has taken on a life beyond SNL, and has potentially ended Spicer’s career in the administration. Mockery is hard to fight against. Every time Spicer walks out to the podium, every journalist in the room is going to see McCarthy trying to attack a journalist with the podium, or holding a turd. For those who read the “Harry
Potter” books remember that the weapon against a Bogart is laughter. Trump and his entire administration are our Bogarts – and they detest and fear laughter.
This is an open thread. Please note I will be away most of the day today, attending a funeral of a friend’s grandfather.
Oh my, oh my. What a Super Bowl, what a Week 2 of the Worst Presidency Ever. The atrocities are too many to document, which is why I’ve added a link to the sidebar where you can find them yourself. And, US Uncut is keeping track of the victories against the Drumpf agenda, which are also starting to pile up.
I have to say that this year’s Super Bowl commercials had a very, VERY anti-Trump and pro-Hillary message. This one in particular, from Audi, made me teary. Is it a coincidence that the girl is a blonde? I think not.
And it’s not just people in the streets and courageous judges who are fighting the Mango Meerkat. It’s businesses, too – in particular, the IT sector, which relies heavily on talent from all areas of the world. And hey, what about those Democrats? Chuck has been everywhere. After Drumpf declined to criticize Pooty-Poot for murdering journalists and dissidents, Pelosi has called for an investigation into the Cheeto’s Russian connections. It’s about freaking time! Meanwhile, civic-minded states and cities are preparing for big legal fights against the Muslim ban. (I refuse to call it a “travel ban.” There’s a religious test, for heaven’s sake!) And the ACLU has received tens of millions in unprecedented donations.
Perhaps the most encouraging thing is the defection of two moderate Republican Senators (Susan Collins and Lisa Murkowski). In response to thousands of calls and letters from their constituents, they refused to vote yes on Betsy DeVos, one of the least qualified of all of the feces-throwing orangutan’s horrific Cabinet nominees. Sadly, she’ll probably get confirmed anyway…but remember, it’s only Week 2, and there are already signs of abandoning ship. Even McTurtle is starting to try to put distance between himself and POTUS.
My feeling about this nightmare in the White House is that it’s just too late for Trump to succeed. Had he come in after Al-Qaeda attacked on 9/11, he might have had a chance. But Bush did his damage, and we have at least partially recovered. America has elected and re-elected an African-American president with a Muslim-ish name; we’ve seen a beloved sports figure celebrated for coming out as transgender; we’ve legalized same-sex marriage and seen millions of women march in solidarity across the country and the world. We’ve moved on. Trump is the least popular President since the tracking started, and he’s going down, down, down.
Somehow, some way, I have faith that we will get rid of this existential threat to our democracy and our planet. I can’t tell you how, and if I did, I’d probably be wrong. But I think it will happen, and sooner rather than later.
This is an open thread.
Good Sunday Widdershins!
I am a day later than normal for the weekend post because Prolix’s Friday post was just soooo excellent it deserved to have more than just one day at the top of the blog. However today is Super Bowl Sunday and for folks like myself and our dear Chat it means the start of our Dark Times as far as football is concerned.
Still, it’s the ultimate game in professional American football and pits the New England Patriots against the Atlanta Falcons. Despite the Falcons being the Saints fiercest rival, I’ll pull for the “dirty birds” in this game because the Pats have won enough. Time for someone else to have a chance.
Even if you aren’t a football fan there are those commercials which are practically an art form themselves. So, I am putting up a few of my favorites from the years and invite you to do the same in the comments. But first I’ll start with a Bad Lip Reading of the 2017 game.
(1). Bad Lip Reading of the 2017 Super Bowl (you’ll have to watch it on youtube)
(2). A classic with herding cats
(3) Tim is very possessive of his Doritos
(4) Who can forget the ETrade baby? Here’s a compilation of 5 commercials
(5) The Budweiser commercials are always pretty good
(6) Doritos commercial because…doxie
(7) A good one from Coca-Cola
(8) Another Doritos commercial – Goat for sale
(9) An older commercial from Bridgestone tires
(10) This Doritos commercial always cracks me up
(11) The little donkey who thought he could (be a Clydesdale)
(12) Last, with all that’s been in the news lately