The Widdershins

Lazy Sunday~It’s strange out there y’all

Posted on: May 14, 2017

A GOOD SUNDAY TO YOU WIDDERSHINS!

Fredster still has not felt like the muses have come around so once again let’s take a look at some of the odd, funny or strange things I’ve found out there on the internet.

Ways in which Amtrak should not emulate the Japanese

This one is kind of old but I had it in the bookmarks for strange/odd news.

So this “super-express train” was barrelling down the tracks the way those Japanese (and German and French and probably Italian) fast trains travel.  (Wish we had some of those)  And anyway a passenger on the train notices that a snake is wrapped around the armrest of a passenger seat (occupied) in front of him!

The train’s operator, JR Tokai, or Central Japan Railway Co., said the passenger sitting in the reserved seat was unaware that the snake was wrapped around his armrest for about 50 minutes until the person behind him saw it and notified a conductor.

Railway spokesman Atsuo Utano said the train crew made an announcement asking if anyone had lost a pet snake and informing passengers of an unscheduled stop, but nobody came forward.

The super-express train made a stop at Hamamatsu station about 25 minutes later, and railway police removed the snake and the train departed in about one minute, Utano said.

He said the train arrived in Hiroshima, its destination, on time.

Now…the snake was on that armrest for 50 minutes before another passenger noticed it? Then, the train people asked if someone had lost their snake?  And then finally, after another 25 minutes they stopped.  Uh..no people.  I would have been looking for that damned emergency rope thing you see on trains in the movies and yanking on it like crazy.  I have a rule about these things:  ∅ snakes on the train.

I could probably die happy too in this case

It’s actually a variation on a theme we’ve seen before.  But still, maybe I won’t even have to die for this to happen.

Corlis Gilchrist, 92, must have been a staunch Democrat.  And we know how staunch Democrats felt after last November, right?

Mr. Gilchrist’s obituary included this :

he was “a proud union member and took great pride in his work with Armstrong Tire, retiring after more than 40 years of service

And so his family did this for him:

…died peacefully this month after family members falsely told him the process to impeach President Donald Trump had begun “so that he could rest in peace.”

I would have lied to him too and secretly hope that it does happen…very soon.  And apparently some people were sooo worried back in November they decided on an early checkout:

Last year, a woman’s obituary published in the Richmond Times-Dispatch said Mary Anne Noland, 68, of Richmond, Virginia, decided to “pass” instead of vote in the November election.

“Faced with the prospect of voting for either Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton, Mary Anne Noland of Richmond chose, instead, to pass into the eternal love of God,” the obituary read. Her husband said it was meant as a joke as a means for her family to continue her sense of humor.

Truth in advertising or delusions of grandeur?

Okay folks, I had to really think about adding this one, but it’s so preposterous I had to include it.

So once again in Florida (always in Florida!) a man is on trial for murder for choking his girlfriend to death.  But Richard Patterson has an explanation of how said choking occurred.  His defense attorney also wants Patterson to provide a visual to the jury.

Not Patterson

Richard Henry Patterson, 65, has admitted he choked his girlfriend, Francisca Marquinez, 60, to death on Oct. 28, 2015, but claims it happened accidentally during oral sex, The Sun Sentinel reported.

He’s now seeking a judge’s permission to show the jury his penis — to prove her death was a mistake.

Patterson’s attorney, Ken Padowitz, said his client’s member figures prominently in his “rough sex” defense, which hinges on the argument that Marquinez died accidentally, while engaging in consensual sexual activity.

Padowitz has enlisted expert witness and former Broward County Medical Examiner Dr. Ronald Wright to testify that Marquinez’s death “is consistent with being accidentally sexually asphyxiated during oral sex,” the motion said.

He insists that a viewing of Patterson’s penis is integral to the jury understanding Wright’s argument.

Now I’m all in favor of a defendant using any means they can to put on a defense but…really?  Wouldn’t it be interesting if, instead of a large Bockwurst, Patterson had more of a vienna sausage and a large ego?  Oh and by the way I hope they convict the bastard.

* * * *

A couple of humorous You Tube Clips

This guy has been doing convenience story inventory for waay too long.

Yes it’s true – watch out for lightening.

* * * *

Okay that’s all I have Widdershins.  Take the conversation in any direction you wish.  And also, a Happy Mothers’ Day to all the moms out there!

 

 

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50 Responses to "Lazy Sunday~It’s strange out there y’all"

Ah, Florida. It never disappoints!

Sending you hugs today. Mother’s Day can be rough for people like you and me.

Re: data entry/inventory. Sure that guy isn’t just playing “Johnny B. Goode”?

Fredster, that Patterson creature should be objectively examined by a medical clinician not of his choosing, one with with ice-cold hands and a perennially sarcastic expression. Should also include thorough screening and swabbing for possible infections.

@1: Well it’s true what “they” say mb, it does get a little easier with time. The florist back home sent me a picture of the arrangement for their marker. She does a great job.

@3: Luna I hope that once he’s convicted that Patterson gets a chance to meet big gay Bubba.

They just ran Mildred Pierce on TCM so for Mothers’ Day here is Carol Burnett’s spoof of the story of an ungrateful and spoiled child. The clip is about 20 minutes.

Looks like MSNBC is looking to not keep Lawrence O’Donnell on, though he gets huge ratings. Meanwhile they’ve given shows to Megyn Kelly, Nicole Wallace, Greta and are in talks with Hugh Hewitt.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/lawrence-odonnell-msnbc-future_us_59162d8ce4b00f308cf5534a?bw6

Great selection Fredster. That guy doing the inventory was amazing. Why do people like Patterson gravitate toward Florida? Or do they they grow them down there? I would like to have seen the legal intake interview of the guy. The attorney undoubtedly said, “Now are you sure you want to go with that story because if you do, you are going to die in prison.” Justice is going to be done.

I refuse to believe that any woman voluntarily wrapped her lips around Patterson’s Wurlitzer.

@9: I think it’s a combo of the native born and the ones who migrate there. After that I think it’s what they also say about La.: It’s not the heat, it’s the stupidity.

@10: I don’t believe that line of b.s. either Sweet Sue.

@11: Fredster, I’ve never heard that one: It’s not the heat, it’s the stupidity! I’m stealing it, forthwith.

Ok, a snake on a train – I’d be jumping off the train before it even stopped. I’m getting chills just thinking about this.

The dude from Florida, I mean, if the member doesn’t fit, you must acquit.

Meanwhile, CNN’s coverage of Putin.

Hilarious.

Love the stories, Fredster! Was the goose hit by lightning? And yes, the guy doing the inventory was amazing. I worked for a shipping company in Bellingham WA in the 80s and my young fingers would fly over the 10-key, but at that, I wasn’t as fast as that guy.

I thought it was sweet that that old man’s family told him Dolt 45 was being impeached. And Fredster, that’s sweet that you still send your Mom flowers!

Are there any other Moms here?

omg! Love that!

Prolix, supposedly the inventory guy has been doing that for 30 years.

@13: Sue, in SE La, that was our excuse and we stood by it. LOL

@14: DYB, LOL on both of your comments there.

@8, That Lack guy must be a raging right-wing nut trying to turn msnbc into Faux News 2, especially when they’re apparently doing much better in the ratings with their current lineup. I don’t get it. What’s next, sacking Rachel?

annie@17: Yep supposedly the goose was hit by lightning and down it went!

Annie, I have a silk arrangement put on the marker for Mothers Day but I also have them put a bow with ribbons on each side and have them put “Mom” on one end of the ribbon and “Dad” on the other. With the cost of silk arrangements and Mothers and Fathers Days being about a month apart I try to use the same arrangement for both days.

@18, I meant the JFK letter. Priceless.

@23, Fredster, that’s very sweet. You’re a loving son!

From the HuffPo link @8:

Lack is said to dislike when people attribute his cable network’s blockbuster ratings to Trump: He believes, according to multiple sources, that the high ratings are largely a product of his programming decisions.

Huge ego at work thee.

@26, omg, he’s horrible! Poor msnbc!

@25: Thank you. it’s just part of honoring them and their memories.

Can you believe this bs?

@29: Sigh. And I was going to say she was doing a half decent job at the U.N. until stoopid comments like that one.

From that zesty article:

“The reason people are uncomfortable is because he acts. He doesn’t talk with a bunch of people about it before, he just acts,” Haley said.

Yes Nikki that’s what does have a lot of people upset.or uncomfortable because, you know, he’s the guy with his finger on the nuclear button.

@29. No. Understanding. Of. Democracy.

This is why businesspeople make bad politicians.

@29, I want Haley to be successful, but her performance this morning was chocked full of Grade A, UL approved stupid. There’s all kinds of blow back from Rexxon’s performance. Adelson is so angry he has given stokes to his next two liver and kidney donors. He had bought up the Israeli franchise for Two Men and a Truck to move the embassy to Jerusalem.

@33: And that’s one reason I prefer not to watch the damned Sunday tawk shows.

3 | NW Luna
May 14, 2017 at 2:21 pm

———–
That idiot needs to go to jail.

Happy Mother’s Day to all us moms!!!!!!!!!!!

6
Yipes, that’s raunchy…couldn’t watch it.

10 | Sweet Sue

Haha, you said it Sue. Then again, Melania didn’t mind as long as her DaddyDouche has enough money.

Daddy/Douche sounds raunchy.

@35, definitely. I meant the unpleasant med exam in place of the jury “exam.” Before sentencing.

I’m still disgusted with nyt, but this is pretty good:

@41: I just got back from wally world but I’ll bookmark that and check it later annie.

@23 Fredster, that is lovely!

Supreme Court will not hear North Carolina GOP legislature’s appeal to reinstate their strict voter ID laws. Sounds like it was for procedural reasons, but we’ll take it. This is where a lower court previous found that GOP targeted African American voters “with almost surgical precision.”

This was one of the big topics my brother-in-law and I yelled at each other over when I visited my sister a few weeks back. I told him about this case and he laughed and said he’s heard nothing about it except on left-wing blogs.

http://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-court-election-idUSKCN18B1QB

Uhm, Ken Starr thinks Trump is ok and a special prosecutor is not necessary.

So apparently Mike Braqwegasdkhfawkefasyky said on Morning Schmoe that after interviews, Kellyanne Conjob would take off her mic and say that she needs a shower. As if she felt so disgusted by what she’d just said.

Is anybody buying this?

The video for 47:

And did everyone watch SNL on Saturday? I missed the opening scene with Dump and Lester Holt (will have to find it later online.) But McCarthy’s Spicer was fascinating. She really does make him seem so much more sympathetic than he deserves; you almost feel sorry for him. Almost. Spicer and Trump making out at the end was great.

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