Posted September 2, 2016on:
Good morning folks. We are coasting downhill into a long weekend. It is my sincerest hope everyone has copious amounts of time to do absolutely nothing.
In preparing for the weekend we should aspire to the Zen state of Mushin. In sports circles, Mushin is often referred to as “being in the zone”. Mushin is characterized by a mind that is empty of all thoughts and exists purely in the current moment. A mind in Mushin is free from worry, anger, ego, fear or any other emotions.
So in this silly season, how can we free our minds from anger when cable news continues to exist? I find myself literally yelling at the teevee. My use of words beginning with an “eff” is through the roof. From overuse, I’ve worn out a blood pressure cuff.
Here’s my suggestion: Let’s take a few minutes and purge ourselves of the prickliest issues angering us most. Here’s how we will proceed. Paraphrase a typical question from a blather-head and then answer the way you would if you were Hillary’s spokesperson for the day. There are no limits as to what you can say.
Here are a few examples:
Q: Mr. Prolix, speaking on behalf of the campaign, how do you react to the latest Clinton email scandal or the Clinton Foundation scandal?
A: Oh, I see you have again been hanging around the Ann Coulter and Breitbart litter box. Let’s start here – can you form any question, any question at all, that doesn’t have as its subject the word “scandal” with the word Clinton just plugged in as a modifier.
Nothing can ever be an issue or a situation or a circumstance – if it involves the Clintons it has to be a scandal. Really, get yourself a thesaurus and have someone read it to you.
Q: Well Prolix, can you tell us why Mrs. Clinton last held a press conference when the sainted press pool still used stone tablets?
A: Well yes, I can, you fetid feculence with feet. You see, and make sure and write this down, the reason we have elections is to declare a winner. To become the winner you must have a strategy. It is not now or has it ever been Hillary’s strategy to mollycoddle the media. You see no one cares, not even a little bit, about how much respect you believe you are entitled since you are a bunch of privileged, spoiled, self-important arse-monkeys.
Q: Another question Prolix, why are people so focused on Hillary’s honesty and trustworthiness?
A: First, I have a question for you. Does being this stupid hurt? People aren’t focused on Hillary’s honesty. You drive the issue in your corporate, for-profit polls. You stack the results with a faulty question by increasing the qualifiers to drive down the favorable responses. So your contrived narrative works except for people who are not now and have never been susceptible to twenty-five years of constant, unflagging assault from haters. Because you know what, Hillary consistently scores above 75% favorability among Democrats.
Q: One last question Prolix, why is limiting contributions to the Foundation mandated if Hillary is President and not when she was Secretary of State?
A: Are you out on a day pass or are you monitored electronically? Eleven and a half million people rely on the Foundation to give them the drugs that keep them alive. We are not going to stop that tomorrow because you don’t understand this one fact: We take rich people’s money and give it to poor people. Most people think that’s a good idea. We give people medicine and healthcare and clean water and food and shelter and a chance at a better life. All the transactions are transparent. Why don’t you ask for the Yam’s tax returns or how deep in hock he is to the Bank of China or Russian oligarchs?
I could go on for days, but I feel better.
Go ahead, purge your anger.
What’s on your mind?
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