Amerexit of 1776…
Posted July 3, 2016on:
It all started about 175 million years ago with the gradual breakup of Pangaea. That was a breakup without a vote unlike our British friends last week with Brexit. So to celebrate our 1776 Amerexit, I thought we might celebrate all things British.
Why you ask?
My British friends always criticize (or criticise for the British spelling) Americans for our tendency to make everything about ourselves — such as the exceptionalism I can never explain.
In any event, instead of focusing on ourselves, given the horrible next couple of years the U.K. is going to experience, I’ve put together some weird British news and some British music. Your musical contributions are encouraged because there is so much from which to choose. Enjoy.
Happy 4th of July and Amerexit of 1776
Here’s some British news of the weird.
The Bunyadi restaurant opened in London in June for a three-month run as the world’s newest nude-dining experience, and now has a reservation waiting list of 40,000 (since it only seats 42). Besides the nakedness, the Bunyadi creates “true liberation” by serving only food “from nature,” cooked over fire (no electricity). Waiters are nude, as well, except for minimal concessions to seated diners addressing standing servers. Tokyo’s Amrita nude eatery, opening in July, is a bit more playful, with best-body male waiters and an optional floor show — and no “overweight” patrons allowed. Both restaurants provide some sort of derriere-cover for sitting, and require diners to check their cellphones at the door.
Least Competent Criminal: Damian Shaw, 43, was sentenced in England’s Chester Crown Court in June after an April raid revealed he had established a “sophisticated” cannabis-growing operation (160 plants) in a building about 50 yards from the front door of the Cheshire Police headquarters.
A March fitness club ad pitch in Sawley, England, pictured an extraterrestrial with the caption, “And when they arrive, they’ll take the fat ones first!” The ad was denounced by an anti-bullying organization as “offensive.”
Life is good now for British men who “identify” as dogs and puppies, as evidenced by a BBC documentary (“Secret Life of the Human Pups”) showing men in body outfits (one a Lycra-suited Dalmatian, “Spot”), exhibiting “sexual” expressions (stomach-rubbing, ear-tickling and nuzzling their “handlers”), eating out of bowls, gnawing on chew toys, wearing collars (so as not to be a “stray”), and jumping in the air for “treats.” However, decency demands that a Pup must only feign urinating against a lamppost.
England does not have no-fault divorce and still requires couples prove adultery, abandonment or “unreasonable behavior,” which leads to strange claims. For instance, one divorcing woman’s petition blamed her husband’s insistence that she speak only in Klingon. Other examples of “unreasonable” behavior (gathered by the Times of London): a husband’s objecting to the “malicious” preparation of his hated tuna casserole, another’s 15-year silence (except for writing him Post-It Notes), a husband’s distorting the fit of his wife’s outfits by frequently wearing them, and one’s insistence that a pet tarantula reside in a glass case beside the marital bed.
Here are a few songs starting from the great British invasion and moving forward.
And just for added measure:
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