The Widdershins

The Republican South Carolina Debate…

Posted on: January 14, 2016

Good afternoon Widdershins.

The one in heels is Marco Rubio. The one with the Larry Craig wide stance is Ted Cruz.

The one in heels is Marco Rubio. The one with the Larry Craig wide stance is Ted Cruz.

How about a debate?  Well, I have some good news for you.  Tonight, for your viewing pleasure and intellectual consternation, we have yet another Republican talking hootenanny.

The festivities begin at 9:00 pm Eastern tonight.  The business porn channel of the One Percent, a/k/a the Fox Business Network, will televise the jamboree.  It will be streaming at

Like successful bedbug eradication, there will only be seven of the remaining twelve candidates in the main event — Donald Trump, Ted Cruz, Marco Rubio, Ben Carson, Chris Christie, Jeb! Bush, and John Kasich.  That is the order in which they qualified under the more stringent polling guidelines (never too late for some standards).

The undercard, beginning at 6:00 pm Eastern, will be Carly Fiorina, Mike Huckabee, and Rick Santorum.  Rand Paul is boycotting with “boy” being the operative word.

People were lined up early in S.C. for tonight's debate...

People were lined up early in S.C. for tonight’s debate…

People are saying this field of candidates resembles the end of any Tarantino movie where everyone is pointing a gun at everybody else.  There are likely to be two main battles – Trump v. Cruz, and everyone else v. Rubio.

The Trump v. Cruz intellectual fisticuffs will have the depth of a dime store mirror:

Trump:  Canadian bacon ain’t real bacon.

Cruz:  Why do you think they call New York the “Big Apple” – its values are no better than the original sin.

The everyone else v. Rubio bout promises to be more entertaining.  There’s the attack from the Trump stooge, Roger Stone, who says:  “Marco Rubio has never run anything. I’m not sure he could run a bath.”

There’s also the possibility of some sort of choral sing-along:  “These boots are made for flippin’ and that’s just what they’ll do. One of these days young Marco’s gonna flip, flop, flip on you.”

Just like the Republican candidates -- chasing the orange hair, err hare...

Just like the Republican candidates — chasing the orange hair, err hare…

All this frivolity will be coming to us from the Palmetto State.  It was the eighth state to ratify the Constitution and the very first state to ratify the Articles of the Confederacy.  What can I say, South Carolina is like that drunk fraternity rushee who signs a bunch of pledge cards – just a natural-born joiner.

South Carolina also has a Lake Strom Thurmond named after its racist, philandering senator of nearly fifty years.  It’s the only known domestic lake entirely comprised of whitewater.

We will be live blogging the debate tonight.  Please stop by and bring your tongue-sharpeners.  Leave your good manners and discretion at the door, it will be free-flowing snark all around.

See you around 9:00 pm Eastern.



167 Responses to "The Republican South Carolina Debate…"

(sigh) One of my college friends and hubby are thinking of making the Palmetto state their retirement home. They have a friend who lives around the Charleston area and have visited the area a few times.. I get that they’re in Ohio and would like to get away from snow and ice. However I don’t think they’ve been on the receiving end of any hurricanes.

Either before or after the debate, this is a must read about the palace intrigue at Fox. With Ailes being on a walker, Rupert is re-exerting control. And this is just rich, Michelle Malkin, a former Fox bobble head, is openly antagonistic toward the Faux boyz, “I can tell you, my base is fed up with Fox.”

“Like successful bedbug eradication, there will only be seven of the remaining twelve candidates in the main event…”

Laughing my silly head off! I’ll try to catch some of it.

R.I.P. Alan Rickman. You’ll always be remembered for this role.

I think the kiddie table debate is on now. Not sure if I want to fool with this one or not. Perhaps I’d rather save my snark for the main event.

Welp, I’ve got FBN on and no kiddie table debate, just that old fool Lou Dobbs.

Carly on Tweety’s show telling lies once again about Clinton/Petraeus.

The kiddie table was over at 7:30 EST. Evidently that witch who calls herself Carly took a swipe at Hillary and Bill’s marriage, “Unlike Hillary, I love spending time with my husband.”

It looks like the witch is trying to pump up her numbers to combat the good reviews of Nikki Haley. Let the Veep stakes begin.

@7, MSNBC has jumped the shark, they had Michele Bachmann on as an analytic pundit. Her pearl of wisdom, “Things could change after tonight’s debate.”

She then went on a rant about Obama giving Gitmo to China, Russia, North Korea or some other country because Gitmo is 90 miles from Cuba.

I may have to start watching Fox.

@8: Oh okay I missed it then. 😦

@9: Being exposed in one sitting to Carly and Bachmann was too much for my tummy to handle. I was almost reaching for the phenergan for the nausea.

Prolix that was a good read with the nymag article. Trouble in wingnut central.

@9: Chris Matthews cut off Bachmann before her eyes started glowing and her head began to spin. He knew projectile vomiting was coming next.

Nice work there, Chris.

Carly looks so awful, I’m beginning to feel sorry for her. Well, not really.

I’m loaded up with painkillers and other better living through pharmaceuticals, so I’m ready to blog this thing if I don’t fall over on my keyboard first.

Tonight, I will be playing a constitutional scholar and expert on non-New York values.

I swear Lou Dobbs died several years ago. Tonight proved it.

@2: I blame Jerry Hall.

@12-16: Well someone is certainly primed for an evening of entertainment. 🙂

Chris Hayes just now trying to stir up some chit about E. Warren and no endorsement of anyone.

Oh! Was I supposed to care?

A brief musical interlude in honor of the newly re-energized Rupert Murdoch:

Chris Hayes is suckling at the trough of Katrina vanden Heuvel — all is well in the world of the nutroots. All nut and no shell.

Chris likes his mommy Katrina. She was his boss before he got this gig.

Oh Gawd, this intro sounds like a car commercial.

How appropriate — showing Weeping Willows before the Repub debate.

Teddy has the mortician make-up tonight.

@21: Another one from her? How many of her spawn did Katrina vanden Heuvel let loose on the world?

I love the bell thing. It sounds like The Price is Right.

Jeb! needs an iron infusion, ASAP.

Okay, the candidate is axed a question and then he answers and goes off on a tangent. New Rule: You don’t answer the question you get zapped with a cattle prod.

Teddie, you’re a millionaire too.

Ted Cruz, an example of why genetic experiments mating humans with squirrels should never happen again.

Those wide stripes make what’s-his-name look like Rico Sauve.

Okay, Teddy’s foreign policy doctrine: If the boat’s GPS goes bad, I commit to you I will start WWIII and I will do it proudly from the White House bunker because I have never served a day in the military and I miss most of the Armed Services Committee meetings.

Kasich has no neck. This could hurt him in New York.

Christie: Military might should always be used to block entrances to bridges in order to ensure land deals for my cronies.

@33, LOL

Yeb! Needs some of Teddy’s makeup for sure!

Christie: Shut down those bridges.

Minions: We understand you, Boss.

Yeb! brought a friend for applause. That’s nice.

Memo to Yeb!: Get contacts and some bronzer.

Marco! You got dem boots on?

Marco’s booties are a little too tight, must have gotten wet from the rising sea level in Miami.

Rubio’s dry mouth is already bothering him but oh my is he masterful!

Oh boy Ben! This should be interesting.

Dr. Carson making no sense but has great hands.

Ben: If we have an EMP I don’t believe anyone can launch a cyberattack because…EMP.

Oh this should be good Teddy.

Answer the question about the loan Ted.

Oh Ted, NYT = New Yawk values?

What Teddy fails to say is that the Senate disclosure happens after the election, the FEC filing is before the election.

@49: He doesn’t want to confuse people with simple little clerical errors.

This is an ultimate fluffing exercise. Here’s the softball, don’t care if you take a swing or not, because we aren’t going to follow-up so blather at will.

Oh this ought to be good. Teddy get those dancin’ shoes on.

Teddy, constitutional qualification might be considered important. Teddy slaps Donald.

OMG did he just say “birther theories” ?

Whoa…testy crowd there in the audience.

Ted is well-rehearsed tonight.

It’s a “Teddy crowd”.

The audience’s white sheets are going to be rumpled after tonight.

I just found out where Donnie and Teddy got their makeup kits. Maybe Yeb! could borrow it.

Uh-oh Marco says his name was mentioned so he gets to tawk.

Honestly, is this the best the Repubs can do?

@59: LOL. It’s affordable, too.

Marco stole the question but didn’t address it.

@61: Yes.

Beta@62: And you can make three easy payments!

@61: You know it is.

I can’t wait for Marco Rubio to climb down off his heels and disappear. I wonder if he has to have a step stool to tie his shoes?

If Chris Christie had the same image consultant as Marco Rubio, Christie’s heels would be somewhere around 3 yards.

We all agree – we get the bell: ding-ding-ding-ding

The audience is treating Ben Carson like a three-legged dog.

Hmmm……Jeb Bush certainly knows a disaster when he sees one. He was such a smashing success as Guv that he trails in every FL poll.

I think Carson just said something about Repugs damaging their noses.

@68: You mean theproblem is not that he’s overweight, but rather that he’s undertall?

Kasich trying the nice, folksy approach. I just fell asleep.

It’s good to see Kasich not being stooped over.

@73, absolutely.

what did that woman say about Hillary!?!?

Ben Carson needs a good hit of Aricept.

Ben: Where did that attitude (or whatever) come from? Look around you Dr. Ben, just look around you.

@78: Or a good toot of coke.

@77: Annie, you mean Carly? Among other things, she said that unlike Hillary, she ( Carly ) enjoys spending time with her husband. What she didn’t say is that her husband moved out 3 years ago to avoid spending time with her. ( Okay, I made that part up but it wouldn’t surprise me if it were true. )

I understand now why I never can remember what channel FBN is on.

@79, if anyone is wondering where the hatefulness is, just listen to the audience and what is animating them.

Wow: A+ rating with the NRA. That means so much to me.

@77 & 81, Carly’s husband is inflatable and he threw himself on a thumbtack to get away from her.

@Prolix – that’s what I meant @79.

Yeb! needs to bulk up. I suggest a steady diet of double bacon triple cheeseburgers.

Cavuto went to the “Guys and Dolls” trunk sale for that suit.

What on earth did Trump learn in civics class about our national legislature?

Yep, Marco looking thirsty. Didn’t he just have a break to take a sip?

@ 32, bravo!

Beata, you’re so funny!

Rubio reminds me of “Our Gang” actor Dickie Moore but without the talent.

Fredster, what I heard was Maria (?) saying something to the token black guy about Hillary supporting sexual misconduct or something like that. I have the tv on in the living room and making dinner in the kitchen, so am not hearing it all, sorry!

Glancing thru the comments, I can see you guys are all on top of your game! Very funny stuff!

Ted Cruz is such a smug SOB!

NY values!?!?! Cruz is such an find asshole. If he wins, we’re going expat.

Cruz is baiting Trump.

supposed to be f’ing asshole, not find. So people in SC are better than people in NY? Douchebag!

Cavuto does look like guys & dolls! Good call!

Kasich: I went to a meeting 15 years ago, so I know which way from up.

I guess Megan Kelly must have bled to death — where’s she tonight?

Sorry for the brief absence. I was fixing some soothing tea. And dropping 1/2 a xanax into it.

@92: Oh you’re right about Dickie Moore!

I gotta go take some more meds.

Chris Christie is back to the stare into the camera mode.

Ouuu Yeb! did a facial expression!

Jeb! standing up for Muslims — he just lost his last 4% of support.

Yeb! has just blown any chance whatsoever and he held up his hand to say, “I like Muslims.”

People saw pipe bombs in the Cali couple’s house? Really???

Kasich mentioned Poppy!!

Chrissy: Funding for the intelligence community? Who’s in charge of that? Oh wait. Never mind.

You focus like a laser and you blind airline pilots. Just sayin’.

John Kasich: I saw a Muslim 15 years ago. I liked him.
Christie: I threw a Syrian off the GW Bridge.
Rubio: Muslims make good boots.
Cruz: Blah, blah, blah, I filed some BS legislation and I want it both ways.
Carson: I saw a Muslim brain once. It looked like a Persian rug, a little wrinkled, but pretty.
Yeb!: I know other country names. Let me lay Indonesia on you — see told ya.

Hillary Clinton’s foreign policy? Seriously???

@102: I’m tellin’ ya Beata, the tea and added ingredient. It helps. 😉

Excellent summation Prolix.

John K: You/we ain’t gettin’ those steel jobs back in Youngstown and you know it.

Oh my Marco too clever abt E.P.A.

Trump: I’ll explain what Marco can’t.

These people are just insanely stupid. They know exactly nothing, nada, zilch about economics or trade. What each one of them has said, everyone one of these fools have said, to do what they want to do would require abrogation of treaties and conventions with just about every country in the world.

Yeb! : Boeing went to S.C. to get away from paying union salary rates in Seattle.

Jeb? doesn’t stand a chance at getting it. Why does he still bother?

Oh the wonderful flat tax…that hurts the poor and middle class the most. Yeah, rite Teddy.

I’ve met the leadership of John Deere — they have to have instructions in the bathrooms on how to clean themselves after a BM.

omgomgomg! Are you hearing Cruz’ tax plan? There would be no revenue for anything–nothing for defense spending which they love so much!

Oh Jebus, the Nat’l Debt. I may have to shut it down on this one.

This thing is interminable. It’s worse than watching a 24-hour “Ishtar” marathon.

I think I’ll just rely on y’all’s comments. I really can’t take this.

Dubya did repatriation of foreign earnings — what it did, caused no investment whatsoever, no job creation whatsoever, where did the repat money go — into the pockets of the One Percent through dividends and stock swaps.

@122: LOL! G-d, that is so funny.

@125, It’s an Ishtar marathon with a corner inset of Gigli.

Ted Cruz is a liar — just a plain flat out bald-faced, chicken lipped liar.

Yeah, Arthur Laffer — yeah, the guy who gave us trickle down economics. Laffer should be put on a leash and left out in the backyard in the dead of winter without a water bowl.

@129: Throw in a simultaneous showing of Heaven’s Gate.

Oh, now we are going to talk terror in 3 minutes.

@131: Oh no they did unh! 😯

Those statistics are just lies — 2014 was an all time low year in crime and to say 2015 was an increase is ludicrous. 2015 was the safest, all time safest, SAFEST, year in the history of policing for police officers.

Is John Kasich doing sign language?

Drop the chum, Marco needs a shark to jump.

Marco and Teddy having a slap fight and Donald is getting chubby.

I declare Rubio tonight’s winner.

@139, LOL — little did I know that the Austrians had put away their lederhosen and broken out the boots. I guess it makes it easier when Heidi goes looking for her grandpa.

Marco: “People are saying what I feel,” and they are naughty, naughty, naughty.

Ding, ding, ding, — we got our Benghazi reference from the chicken-lipped one.

Donald Trump looked mighty tired. He must have stood too close to Jeb! and caught the low energy disease.

@139: Awww…such a shame. In the video there are no awards or trophies in the case to the right side. 😦

I always just knew there was somethin’ special about eatin’ at the Waffle House.

Agree Trump looked tired. I also thought he didn’t get quite the applause there that he got at some of the others (I haven’t watched that much). Overall, I can’t remember hearing so much bullshit from such horrible people before. I loathe them all, but I think my kid is right and Cruz is the worst.

@146: Until I had to switch it annie (I had all I could take) that sure did sound like a Cruz-friendly audience.

A must read smack down of Morning Schmoe.

@146, I agree with Laker — Cruz is detestable — just a common political whore who’s really smart without a whit of ethics or morals.

Laurence Tribe just called Cruz a constitutional opportunist who believes the Constitution hasn’t changed since 1788 for everyone but him.

Tribe is actually talking about the Originalists on the Supreme Court and how they would vote against Cruz. Of course, we talked about that yesterday.

@150: What show was that on Prolix?

@151, it was on MSNBC’s after debate coverage. Laurence Tribe called in and Tweety, for once in his life, just let Tribe talk and talk he did. He said things like, “I know Cruz and it is just like what he would do as a student of mine, he would insist that the Constitution hasn’t changed since 1788 unless it affects him. He’s a constitutional opportunist for his political career.” He went on for several minutes.

Tribe made a really good point about standing. The way this whole shooting match could get before the courts is if some Secretary of State somewhere said, “Cruz, I don’t think you are qualified and so I’m not putting you on the ballot.” That is a sure fire way to get standing and the Supremes couldn’t sidestep the issue as political since the harm would be obvious in being kept off the ballot.

@153: That would be so delightful to watch.

Okay, I’m signing off. I have appointments tomorrow. Good night folks.

I propose a drrinking game for the next Repub debate. Take a sip every time someone says “Hillary Clinton”.

chat, we’d all be falling-down, rip-roaring drunk.

@156: Snort! We would be passed out before you knew what happened to you.

annie, we commented the same thing at the same time. 😆

Fredster, great minds think alike!

annie: 😆
So true!

Good grief – we have a Dem debate this Sunday! Why oh why did the DNC and Debbie Wasserman Schultz come up with this stupid schedule? They better not be doing this in the middle of a playoff game.

Hmmm…maybe we have a case of this today.

Or everyone’s worn out from yesterday.

That could be.

New post upstairs so everyone won’t have such a heavy lift when refreshing.

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