Lazy Weekend: Hurray! It’s Weasel Stomping Day.
Posted September 12, 2015on:
Are y’all ready? I love a good holiday, especially one with no fixed date that can be celebrated at will. Weasel Stomping Day seems to fit that criteria nicely, and does not involve shopping, putting up a tree, production of a festive repast, or most of the other trappings of the more pedestrian holidays. All you really require is a sturdy pair of boots, a Viking helmet, and some mayonnaise for the lawn (or reasonable equivalent if you are a lawn-free city dweller), and you are good to go. We are totally surrounded by weasels these days, and it’s just not pretty.
As a non-violent animal lover, I am not suggesting that we stomp on actual weasels as suggested by holiday father Weird Al Yankovic, but rather as a metaphorical beat down of weasels cleverly disguised as actual humans. You know who they are – they posture away on television and in print on a daily basis. Now, tell me that you would not like to lace your boots, adjust your Viking helmet and jump up and down – metaphorically, of course – on any number of weasels of the human persuasion. You know that you’ll feel much, much better after a through stomp or two.
I will go ahead and offer my candidates for a hearty weasel stomping while you check around the house for your WSD gear. When you are suited up and ready, please post your weasels or anything else that you might like. Be sure to sing along with the little ditty at the top of the post. If this goes well, we might make it a recurring holiday such as “I Told Ya So Day” became, here in the Land of the Widdershins.
Stomp on, Widdershins.
(1) Kim Davis. Do I really need to say why she is my prima candidate? The woman who found Jesus after multiple marriages and commissions of adultery? Good thing that her clerk was but a wretch at the time of her applications.
(2) Morning Joe. The entire bloody cast. To listen to them, one would think that Hillary Clinton were guilty of treason. Y’all are absolutely disgusting, and I will never ever watch a single minute of your program again.
(3) Andrea Mitchell. Her latest interview with Hillary beat everything that I have ever seen. She should remember Madeline Albright’s admonition regarding special places in hell………
(4) Republicans in Congress. At least the ones that plan to cry “Shutdown!” again. Enough, already.
(5) Donald Trump. Because he needs it. Desperately.
(6) NYT Editorial Staff. You know who you are. Trumpeting headlines about Hillary that you then manage to point out in an “oh, by the way, it really is not illegal” on a page buried deep in the back and well below the fold. You suck.
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