The Widdershins

MW: Look, Up in the Sky! A Play in One Farcical Act.

Posted on: August 24, 2015

Up, Up and Away

Up, Up and Away

Good Monday to you Widdershins!

Our Madamab is swamped by work!  I think I saw a finger wiggling out from a pile of graphs, charts, handouts and the rest.  And I believe I saw a snorkel stick up out of the pile just so she could breathe!

Dear chat is sitting at home itching and scratching terribly from her case of hives

Good guy Prolix has had to retire for a day or two to rest his fingers because he has been doing the heavy lifting around here lately.

And your faithful servant here is trying to cope with the not-so-good news of the severe illness of a good friend the he went to college with!  We’re talking long times here.

So, with that in mind I went rummaging through the posts and found this hilarious one act play by our  MB and I dusted it off for today.  Do you remember all the coverage of the “balloon boy” when that goofy event occurred?  Remember all of the talking heads pontificating over “how did he do it?”, “where were the parents?”, “Is this a big hoax?”.  Now…take those same talking heads and exchange balloon boy for Hillary Clinton and email server.  It’s the same thing.  The talking heads are grasping at every little “leaked” item they can over this.  Color me surprised, but Friday I watched Bill Maher and even he says he doesn’t get what all the hubbub is about.  So, read the play and make the substitutions of Hillary and server.  You’ll find the similarities amazing.

 

This is a wide open post for any way you wish to discuss things.

line-divider

THE SCENE: A swank TV studio, with all the zoomy, whizzy lights, giant flashing screens, deep-pile royal blue carpeting, poreless, lacquered newsbots, and hysterical black-clad assistants one could ever desire. We are in the back of the studio, in the glass-enclosed center of all the action. EDITORS 1, 2, 3 and 4 are all sitting in their leather chairs, directing the action by talking to each other, pointing at their MacBooks, and shouting into their wireless headsets. They are all in their 20’s and have just been promoted after their more experienced bosses “aged out of the business.”

EDITOR 1 (swigging a Red Bull): What’s new on Twitter? We’ve gotta have something for the next segment.

EDITOR 2 (nervously): Let’s see…Demi and Ashton just tweeted…

EDITOR 3 (yawning): Oh please. They tweet when they pee!

EDITOR 4 (pushing in excitedly): Guys, the Iranian Revolutionary Guard just got bombed! A bunch of people died and that DinnerJacket guy is blaming us and the Brits! This could be the start of a huge international incident!

(A brief silence, then:)

EDITORS 1-3 (bursting into laughter): HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

EDITOR 3 (wiping tears from her eyes): Oh, that was a good one! Like anyone cares about that crap these days.

(EDITOR 4 subsides into a humiliated silence.)

EDITOR 2 (eagerly): What about Sarah Palin? Sometimes we can just say her name and people think it’s news!

EDITOR 1 (dismissively): Nahhhh, we tried that two days ago. It bombed.

EDITOR 2 (peevishly): FINE. Uh, uh…Oooooh! (points at his MacBook) Check this out!

(All the EDITORS gather around the screen.)

EDITOR 3 (finally interested): Holy shit! A kid jumped in a balloon in a back yard and it got loose?

EDITOR 2 (proud): Huh? Huh? Is this good or what?

EDITOR 1 (shouting into his headset): Listen up, people! We’ve got something. Get ready to roll in five!

EDITOR 4: This story is unbelievable! Wow, it’s…hmmm.

EDITOR 3 (dismissively): What is it NOW?

EDITOR 4: Well, just shooting it out there, but…what if the kid was never in the balloon to begin with? Or what if he was, but he’s not now? Or what if these parents are making the whole thing up?

EDITOR 1 (after a brief pause): What are you, 25?

EDITOR 4 (nervously): Uh…26.

EDITOR 1 (smugly): I figured. God, you old people just don’t understand the business any more! (gets up and starts pacing) The story’s a win-win. If it’s a hoax, we do a story about the hoax and we milk that for a week. If it’s true, boo-hoo, the kid’s dead – we milk that for a week. If the kid arrives in the balloon safely, we milk his heroic and incredible escape for a week. (suddenly shouting) DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!

(EDITOR 4 looks cowed and ashamed. EDITORS 2 and 3 look happy and superior.)

EDITOR 1 (with chilling finality): You’re fired. (sitting down, shouting into his headset) Hey! You in the black!

(ALL the assistants whirl around at the same time, with hopeful smiles on their faces.)

EDITOR 1 (annoyed): NOT YOU! The guy with the cool hair and soulpatch. Get up here, man.

(The New Guy pumps the air with his fist, then starts making his way to the glass booth as EDITOR #4 exits ignominiously. Suddenly, EDITOR #4 stops his exit, and stands in the middle of the newsroom. He exudes a quiet and desperate dignity which is compelling enough to cause a pause in all the furious activity.)

EDITOR 4: You are all a disgrace to journalism. Walter Cronkite and Edward R. Murrow are ROLLING IN THEIR GRAVES!

(He swoops out dramatically. With a shrug, the buzzing and rushing resume.)

EDITOR 3 (yawning again): What the hell was he talking about?

THE NEW GUY: Should I Google ’em?

EDITOR 2 (completely uninterested): Whatever. (looks at his MacBook, brightens) Oooh, video!

EDITOR 1 (excitedly): Send it through!

EDITOR 3 (happily):  News for a week no matter what happens. We are AWESOME!

(All the EDITORS high-five as:)

(LIGHTS OUT.)

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47 Responses to "MW: Look, Up in the Sky! A Play in One Farcical Act."

Not hard to see the similarities there. Add in the adults who should know better but don’t care. It looks like this week it’s all Joe Biden. I wonder if Schmoe is still hyperventilating over Hillary’s orange pantsuit. Why didn’t Mika mention those fabulous matching orange shoes? I’m not even a shoe person, but even I thought they were fabulous.

@GAgal: Yep, it sounds like Biden is the flavor of the week this time.

I caught about 3 minutes of Schmoe and then switched it off when he started on “Bad State Dept.! Bad, bad, bad….protecting Hillary Clinton!”. (making retching sounds)

I don’t think Mika is fond of Hillary. And while I doubt she’ll appear on Schmoe, if she does, I hope she throws some shade Mika’s way, the way Jessica Lange did with Lea Michelle.

GAgal@3: From the article:

And he noted that he and his law partner Katherine M. Turner both have security clearances.

OHHHHHH! So apparently he’s been checked, double-checked, vetted and cleared to have access to sensitive material. Funny how none of the talking heads mention that fact. They also never mention the fact that the safe to store the thumb drive was provided by the State Dept. I am more than certain that the safe met all the requirements mandated to hold removable media in a secure way.

Oh my, The Rude Pundit has such a way with words.

Listening to the Republicans running for president, you’d think that we live in a blight-ridden hellscape filled with Mexican rapists taking our jobs by shooting us all to death while breeding anchor babies, crazy Muslims trying to behead Christians on street corners while atheist liberals applaud their devotion to their culture, and tyrannical Hillary Clinton flouting email rules while personally murdering Americans in Benghazi with Planned Parenthood fetus parts, not to mention the Iranian nukes ready to rain down on us at any second (or ten years from now, whichever comes first), China dragging us into the sea of financial ruin while loaning us more money, families falling to pieces because Mom says she’s always been a man and the kids are on Obamacare, and the military ready to take away everyone’s guns before forcing us all to give up our coal and gas-burning ways to please the so-called “scientists” who think they’re so smart. And it’s all because that a**hole Barack Obama is too weak, like that f*cking p*ssy Jimmy Carter, because he refuses to bomb the shit out of any countries that fuck with us. – See more at: http://rudepundit.blogspot.com/#sthash.jAN7AIwt.dpuf

Kinda cleaned up because Rude Pundit has a potty mouth at times.

“Doo-da-dee-dee-dah-dah-dah. I think I’ll just sun myself in this driveway here.”

Great post, Fredster, and love the Rude Pundit!

annie@9: I haven’t even finished reading the link and when I saw Digby I thought: Digby?? Supporting Hillary??? 😯

Going back to reading it now.

From Digby’s piece, Ralston asked:

Why did she have that on an insecure server?

Okay, the next question Mr. Ralston is this: How do you know this was not a secure server? Do you know whether or not any type of encryption was used for that server? Do you know the level of encryption? I don’t care if the physical server was sitting in Bill’s bathroom, because if it was secured electronically that’s all that should have mattered.

Oh annie, thanks sooo much for that link. Very much appreciated.

@9 and 12, yes, thanks for that link. It certainly rings with authenticity.

Okay, this shows my isolationist tendencies, but I recognize the Digby name and recall she is from 2008 as an Obama devotee and an “un-nice person to Hillary”, but some more context would be helpful. Anyone?

Well maybe not as bad as I thought I recalled:

http://digbysblog.blogspot.com/2008/04/storylines-by-digby-andrea-mitchell.html

But I just don’t recall her being that much on Hillary’s side.
You can dig (heh) through Digby’s archive but maybe I was wrong.

Thanks Fredster, those links are helpful filling in the blanks.

@17, Roger Ailes is getting a bit of his own medicine from Donnie J. What is happening here is “The Real Candidates of the Republican Party.” It has turned into a full-blown reality show with hissing and spitting back and forth for an ever winnowing group who might be interested.

It was interesting that Trump’s buddies on the curvey couch over at Fox must have gotten the word to punch back. What they need to remember is you have to watch both heads on a two-headed rattlesnake.

Prolix@18: I almost think it’s like episodes from “The Real Housewives of” whichever city you wish. It seems almost that scripted.

I’ve been having fun with the meme-maker.

Got another one.

@20 and 21, those are good.

@22: And pretty easy to do. I’ll send you some info.

Trump has a great new endorsement–David Dukes. The campaign must be so proud.

Fredster, those are cute! And I saw on Huffpo that Jill Biden isn’t exactly leaping at the idea. Who could blame her? She still has another year and half to go as 2nd lady, which is probably tedious. She was probably looking forward to retiring, and doing what she wants to do.

Ooops, meant to type David Duke, not Dukes. The former “grand wizard” of the kkk.

I was wondering something about Biden running. If he did run, wouldn’t he be likely to split the Bernie vote? Hillary voters are going to vote for Hillary no matter what, but Biden would take away votes from someone and it seems likely to me that it would be Bernie. Maybe O’Malley and the other guy also, but I would think it would be bad for Bernie if Joe runs more so than Hillary. What do you think?

annie@26: I actually saw one blurb that said the Bernie voters wouldn’t go with Biden because of all the banksters and credit card companies in his home state and who he’s taken money from.

Dukie boy is just trying to get some attention.

Watched the Trump speech out in Iowa. That man is unbelievable — can’t form a complete sentence. When asked about Scott Walker, he said something like, “I love Wisconsin people, I have a great relationship with Wisconsin’s people,” — like he knows three people from Wisconsin.

He actually had Jorge Ramos thrown out of the press conference. It was UGLY. After the they figured out what an epic mistake that was, they let him back in, he got to ask questions, and Trump ended up saying, “Do you know how much I’m suing Univision for? You need to go back to Univsion.”

That will be tomorrow’s news — as Trump would say, “It’ll be ‘uge!”

@26, here’s an idea because I don’t believe Biden is so politically deaf as to seriously consider mounting a campaign. Here’s the idea:

Hillary needed the news story changed away from the server silliness. What would quell that story and be bigger? A potential Biden run would be a bigger story. Biden was approached and the meeting with Elizabeth Warren was part of it. Biden would love to be Secretary of State in a Hillary administration. Elizabeth Warren is getting a chit.

That is strategic thinking emblematic of Axelrod, Carville, and Podesta.

Biden understands such things and would play along.

Just a thought — you read it here first.

A quote from a Trump supporter at a Frank Lutz focus group
“He wants to make America great again. It’s on his hat.”

I wish we had nesting in the comments at least to one level.

A quote from a Trump supporter at a Frank Lutz focus group
“He wants to make America great again. It’s on his hat.”

Banging head on desk (closest gif I could find)

Prolix@30: I wondered about the possibility of Hillary offering him a little sumpin-sumpin, but SoS? Gaffs? Too touchy-feely? Hell, leave him at the Naval Observatory.

@33, I don’t think Sherrod Brown wants a roommate.

@31, that is about the best quote of the year.

@35: Well Sherrod can be S.o.S. There are ways around these things.

I saw part of the Trump presser where he had the Univision guy removed. Loved how he said “I didn’t throw him out.”
D-O-U-C-H-E!

@27, oh, bummer.

@28, haha! So true!

@30, love it! I hope you’re right Prolix!

Can someone be vp for 16 years? I wonder if his wife would like that. The media is saying she doesn’t want to run. She’s probably sick of it, I would be.

Re: the Trump supporter comment, just when you think they (the supporters) couldn’t look any dumber. Too bad we couldn’t give them Texas or some island, and Trump could be their Emperor.

annie@41: Remember the old tag line: And they vote too! 😯

annie@40: I don’t see why not. I don’t see any term limits here:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_political_term_limits#The_Americas

Eurogirl at Upps place says Biden hired one of John Edwards campaign people.

Yeah, he hired one of Edward’s former people however I believe it was for a position in his office not for a campaign.

@44: Who is Eurogirl?

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