HAPPY NEW YEAR AND RESOLUTIONS
Posted on: January 1, 2013
- In: New Years | Open Thread | Uncategorized
- 27 Comments
Aren’t you about sick of these 2013 thingies? Well they should be over today except for the ones you see on the teevee.
It’s the start of a new year and with it comes the obligatory New Year’s Resolutions. And they are wonderful things, aren’t they? They seem to imply that we are seriously going to make some phenomenal change in our personal behavior. But sadly, as with the best of intentions, they usually go flying out the window by the second week or so.
With resolutions in mind, let’s take a look at the resolutions of some of our national politicians.
John Boehner
I John Boehner resolve never to wear that orange spray paint on my face again or to ever show up in Congress like this again.
Eric Cantor
I Eric Cantor hereby resolve to redo the schedule of the House so that we work more than 150 days a year and also to be more honest and truthful so people will stop referring to my office as this.
Paul Ryan
I Paul Ryan, do hereby resolve to learn a new way of doing math and to throw away all of my copies of Atlas Shrugged.
Mitch McConnell
I Mitch McConnell do resolve to work more fairly with the Senate Democrats so that we can actually accomplish something and to not go back on my word so people will not believe I am doing this each time I speak.
Lindsey Graham
I Lady Lindsey uh Lindsey Graham resolve not to get my panties in a knot over every little thing so that people will not refer to me as her..uh him…uh whatever.
And finally…
Barack Obama
I Barack Obama hereby resolve not to act like this when negotiating with the Republicans because you just can’t trust ‘em.
Okay my fellow Widdershins, what are some of your resolutions? My main one is to get some weight off. I have had two doctors fuss at me about it so I simply must do it, if for no other reason than to shut them up.
This is an open thread.
27 Responses to "HAPPY NEW YEAR AND RESOLUTIONS"
January 1, 2013 at 9:25 am
New Year’s resolutions? Where do I begin?
(1) To get some pounds off. I will breathe and eel better if there are 20-30 pounds less.
(2) To be a little kinder and less judgmental. This is becoming more of a problem as I age.
(3) To thoroughly enjoy each day. Lord knows, I have more behind me than I have in front of me, so I might as well..
(4) To become more organized and follow through on projects. All of this has slipped since retirement,. You know that the amount of work really does expand to fill the time alloted.
(5) To rev up and become politically involved for 2012.
January 1, 2013 at 10:14 am
I have two New Year’s resolutions:
1) To get rid of things ( including people and thoughts ) I don’t need or want in my life. I have already started this process and am continuing it as 2013 begins. For example, I have severed relationships with a few people who are “toxic” to me. Also, I was once very interested in genealogy and accumulated a ton of family facts, papers, and photos, etc. I now feel this weighs me down, so I have given some family things to my cousins and have thrown other things away. It is a very freeing experience. I want to do more of this “cleansing” in my life in the coming year.
2) To be more organized. People who know me well would laugh at this since I am already an organized sort of person. Hey. I’m a Virgo-rising librarian who used to do cataloging for a living! But in 2013, I want to enhance my methods of organization to make my life easier and more simple.
2013 is going to be a year of big changes in my life. I want to be ready for them.
January 1, 2013 at 10:22 am
Fredster, this is a very clever post. So much better than the standard New Year’s crap. Love the Victor / Victoria pic for Lady Lindsey.
I hope 2013 will be a great year for you and all the Widdershins!
January 1, 2013 at 11:31 am
Happy New Year my friends!!!!
Resolutions – isn’t funny how many of us make a resolution to lose weight?? Why haven’t they come up with a magic pill that would just do it????
One of my resolution is to, yes, lose some more weight. I’ve been exercising for almost two years now (seriously exercising), but plateaued a loong time ago and haven’t been able to get over the hump. Kickboxing didn’t do it (and I started hurting my elbow; poor technique on my part, but the end result is the same.) Next week I’ll be starting another workout called CrossFit. I guess these things are all over the country and I know a few people who swear by it. I figure if anything gets me ready for the Spartan Race next June, this thing might!
I don’t know what else I make a resolution about…
BTW, why are Tea Partiers still around? Weren’t they supposed to go away after the last election? Why do they still have such a strong hold on our political establishment?
January 1, 2013 at 12:05 pm
Beata@4: I figure nothing is going to change with the politicians, especially the Republicans, so I might as well poke fun at them. 
January 1, 2013 at 12:16 pm
Resolved….I will keep those Hillary For President Signs in my window regardless of what my Neighbors say…
January 1, 2013 at 12:20 pm
DYB said: Resolutions – isn’t funny how many of us make a resolution to lose weight?? Why haven’t they come up with a magic pill that would just do it????
D: I think I’m going to try this Sensa stuff and see how that does.
Michael: Tell your neighbors to stuff it! 
January 1, 2013 at 12:27 pm
chat said: To be a little kinder and less judgmental. This is becoming more of a problem as I age.
Personally I’m looking forward to becoming a crusty old bastard.
January 1, 2013 at 12:39 pm
Happy New Year, Widdershins!
This is a fabulous post, Fredster! A classic!
BTW, why are Tea Partiers still around? Weren’t they supposed to go away after the last election? Why do they still have such a strong hold on our political establishment?
Because the Tea Party is not a grassroots movement. It is funded by the corporate overlords–there’s the hold.
January 1, 2013 at 12:46 pm
SophieCT: Thanks Sophie!! I figured I might as well have fun with it. I wanted to try to do a resolution with Nancy Pelosi but couldn’t figure out what to do w/out being too mean.
January 1, 2013 at 12:54 pm
Pat Johnson has my permission to miss all the dance & music recitals and concerts her grand children and their parents make her suffer through annually…you have my complete permission Pat if they take issue with it send them to me! GRRRR
Pat you also no longer have to go to book club and listen to that insufferable woman talk about he child that works for Jim Demint you no longer have to sit through her flapping jaw…ever again. you have permission to let her have it Ru Paul Style!
Pat I will burn a copy of “The English Patient Directors Cut Blue Ray Edition in your honor…. Because I care…
January 1, 2013 at 1:29 pm
Oh hey y’all: Chat’s Dawgs are playing Nebraska now so let’s cheer ‘em on. Hope they play better than my Tigers did last night. They were pitiful.
Geaux Dawgs!!
January 1, 2013 at 7:17 pm
Resolutions? Sheesh. Decisions, decisions. The one I really need to make is to stop procrastinating. I’ll start tomorrow.
Happy New Year to all!
January 1, 2013 at 7:29 pm
Fredster – priceless post. I was going to think deeply about resolutions, but then I found that I could not get my garage door open this morning and thought oh swell, this year is starting off just as well as last year, so why bother? And believe me, I tried – useing the old hair drying to melt ice, using the spade under the door to get rid of any remaining ice, using lock de-icer, using brute force – alas, had to call my son and beg him to come over (6’1 and 190 pounds of solid muscle might just do the job) but he’s in bed sick. So much for garbage day tomorrow, and I can’t get to my car to take Milly the Wonderdog to the vet for her shots. Mind you, after Zeke’s $500 vet bill last friday I can’t afford it anyway. Mind you it’s better than breaking my shoulder and humerus in three places, but I did have hopes. Ah well, another year of same old, same old so I resolve to walk Milly every day and go to the pool for continued physio. I also resolve to stay more in touch with my old friends. I’m turning into a curmudgeonly hermit.
Happy New Year to all.
January 1, 2013 at 8:03 pm
Fredster, that is the best New Year’s post ever. i especially enjoyed it after last night when I was sitting here happily watching Live From Lincoln Center NY Philharmonic’s tribute to Marvin Hamlisch. Needless to say i was in a really happy new year mood after listening to Audra McDonald, Josh Groban, Kelli O’Hara and others sing Marvin’s beautiful score from “A Chorus Line”, which never gets the vocal treatment it deserves because it has to be sung by dancers. Then for the finale, they aactually brought out a 16 person chorus line, gold costumes, top hats, and all to perform “One”.
Then the news broke in. Biden all dressed up as if he were about to be inaugurated heading to the hill to “save” us from this insanity. What-no dropping ball? Instead we have the US congress on New Year’s Eve?
I don’t think there’s any resolution I could make that will fix this. These morons easily put me to sleep before midnight. Happy New Year All. I resolve to quit watching ANY network or cable “news”!
January 1, 2013 at 8:23 pm
Mary Luke@23: Thank you. I know there is “stuff” going on with the “fiscal cliff”, but I’m mostly blissfully ignorant, having watched football bowl games all day and there’s another about to start. If the Rethuglicans feel so strongly about spending cuts, then let the sequester take effect. But noooo….cuz it would cut their precious Defense Dept. too and they don’t want that.
HT, hope you get the garage door opener fixed soon!
January 1, 2013 at 8:28 pm
Almost forgot: Congrats to Chat’s Dawgs! They whupped up on Nebraska. 
January 1, 2013 at 8:30 pm
Fredster, very funny post!
Hope we all have a better year in 13 than we did in 12. At least that horrific prez election is over.
January 1, 2013 at 9:48 pm
Did anyone notice Snooki and Boner use the same color of bronzer?
Comments are closed.
January 1, 2013 at 8:03 am
fredster: I resolve to stop expecting congress to act on behalf of the nation when it is pretty obvious that this is never going to happen when you have the Radical Right working with DINO Dems and an acquiescent Barack Obama.
I predict that virtually nothing will get done since we are in for more monthly debates on the debt where most social safety net programs will be placed on the chopping block as a means to “balance the budget”.
The issues demanding attention will sit on the sidelines because we are in for more unreasonable proposals that almost guarantee women’s rights will be plundered, seniors will be placed even further at risk, and healthcare costs will rise even more so.
Gun control? Forget about it. Our time will be wasted arguing over “entitlements” that this society of “moochers” expects and the war in Afghanistan will be forgotten since “progress” there is a joke.
2013 will be “business as usual” which means that the business of the nation at large will be balanced between the demands of the Right along with the “negotiating powers” of President Indifferent.